We all need a good laugh every once in a while, and what better way to get one than by reading some funny random quotes that make no sense?

These quotes might not have any deep philosophical meaning, but they will certainly bring a smile to your face.

From comedians to anonymous sources, here are 30 funny and nonsensical quotes that will make you chuckle.

  1. “I have a photographic memory, but I always forget to bring my camera.” – Anonymous
  2. “If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving is definitely not for you.” – Steven Wright
  3. “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Anonymous
  4. “I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving energy.” – Anonymous
  5. “If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space.” – Anonymous
  6. “I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort.” – Zach Galifianakis
  7. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not sure.” – Anonymous
  8. “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?” – Abraham Lincoln
  9. “I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.” – A. Whitney Brown
  10. “I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” – Chandler Bing (Friends)
  11. “If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson
  12. “I’m not sure how to say this, but I’m kind of a big deal.” – Ron Burgundy (Anchorman)
  13. “I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.” – Anonymous
  14. “The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Anonymous
  15. “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Anonymous
  16. “If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.” – Anonymous
  17. “I have a degree in liberal arts. Do you want fries with that?” – Anonymous
  18. “I’m not afraid of death. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen
  19. “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.” – Anonymous
  20. “I’m not crazy, my reality is just different than yours.” – Lewis Carroll (Alice in Wonderland)
  21. “I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” – Phyllis Diller
  22. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas Edison
  23. “I can resist everything except temptation.” – Oscar Wilde
  24. “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.” – Anonymous
  25. “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Anonymous
  26. “I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.” – Jerome K. Jerome
  27. “The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream.” – Bill Murray
  28. “I’m not short, I’m just concentrated awesome.” – Anonymous
  29. “I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.” – Anonymous
  30. “I’m not sure what my spirit animal is, but I’m pretty sure it has a drinking problem

20 Random Facts about Dolphins

December 21st 2022

Get ready to dive into the world of dolphins. Here are 20 random but fascinating facts about these intelligent and playful marine animals.

1. Dolphins, porpoises, and whales are all mammals from the family ‘Cetaceans’, which is from the Greek word meaning “sea monster”.

2. There are 42 known species of Dolphin, including Bottlenose Dolphin, Orcas (Killer Whales), Spinner Dolphin and Atlantic Spotted Dolphin.

3. Wild dolphins have been seen playing with coconuts.

4. If a dolphin is unwell, other dolphins will help it to the surface to breath.

5. Ancestors of dolphins walked the earth 50 million years ago. They are distant cousins of land animals, including deer, hippos, and bisons.

6. Dolphins have a hole in the top of their heads which they use to breathe.

7. When humans take a normal breath, they replace only 15% of the air in their lungs. When dolphins take a breath, they replace 90% of the air in their lungs.

8. A two-headed dolphin was found in western Turkey in 2014.

9. Scientists who have studied dolphin behaviour believe that dolphins have the longest memory in the animal kingdom.

10. In an experiment scientists learnt that Dolphins can talk and understand each other over the phone.

11. Some dolphins can understand as many as 60 words.

12. A baby dolphin (know as a dolphin calf) is born underwater tail-first. After the mother gives birth, she must immediately take it to the surface to breathe.

13. A dolphin can make about 700 clicking sounds per second. The clicks come from deep inside the dolphin’s head.

14. Every year, a dolphin’s teeth grow a new layer, similar to the rings inside a tree trunk. Scientists can tell how old a dolphin is from the layers on its teeth.

15. Dolphins can move each eye independently. They can move each eye up, down, forward, and backward, giving them nearly 360 degrees of vision.

16. Dolphins typically do not live alone, but rather in schools or pods. Large pods can have 1,000 members or more.

17. Some scientists think that dolphins can use their high-pitched sounds to stun or paralyze fish while hunting.

18. Dolphins cannot swim backward, which makes it difficult for them to escape fishing nets. If they can’t get to the surface, they can drown in a matter of minutes.

19. Pink dolphins, called “botos,” are actually albino dolphins. They typically live in Brazil, but have been seen in the Gulf of Mexico.

20. The Dolphins is the name of professional American football team, The Miami Dolphins. The Dolphins have appeared in five Super Bowls winning three. The mascot of the Miami Dolphins is known as ‘T.D.’ (The Dolphin).

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