30 Funny Random Quotes That Make NO SENSE (but will make you laugh)
We all need a good laugh every once in a while, and what better way to get one than by reading some funny random quotes that make no sense?
These quotes might not have any deep philosophical meaning, but they will certainly bring a smile to your face.
From comedians to anonymous sources, here are 30 funny and nonsensical quotes that will make you chuckle.
- “I have a photographic memory, but I always forget to bring my camera.” – Anonymous
- “If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving is definitely not for you.” – Steven Wright
- “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Anonymous
- “I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving energy.” – Anonymous
- “If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space.” – Anonymous
- “I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort.” – Zach Galifianakis
- “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not sure.” – Anonymous
- “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?” – Abraham Lincoln
- “I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.” – A. Whitney Brown
- “I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” – Chandler Bing (Friends)
- “If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson
- “I’m not sure how to say this, but I’m kind of a big deal.” – Ron Burgundy (Anchorman)
- “I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.” – Anonymous
- “The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Anonymous
- “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Anonymous
- “If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.” – Anonymous
- “I have a degree in liberal arts. Do you want fries with that?” – Anonymous
- “I’m not afraid of death. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen
- “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.” – Anonymous
- “I’m not crazy, my reality is just different than yours.” – Lewis Carroll (Alice in Wonderland)
- “I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” – Phyllis Diller
- “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas Edison
- “I can resist everything except temptation.” – Oscar Wilde
- “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.” – Anonymous
- “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” – Anonymous
- “I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.” – Jerome K. Jerome
- “The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream.” – Bill Murray
- “I’m not short, I’m just concentrated awesome.” – Anonymous
- “I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.” – Anonymous
- “I’m not sure what my spirit animal is, but I’m pretty sure it has a drinking problem
